How does it happen?

I feel like I am in a long distance relationship during ancient time when communication was a barrier.

While I am typing, I am thinking about Choo Lay Keng (Carol Choo). How is it like to be underground for 18 years? A lot of people think Carol is a lucky woman to have Andy Lau as her groom. That's the dream of million girls and Carol owns that dream. I guess most people are happy for Carol. She deserves a happy ending.

I admire Carol so much. She has the strong determination and trust that I do not have. How is it like to be living on her own all these years? I guess Andy Lau won't have enough time to be there for her every time she needs him. She won't be able to call him every now and then. All she can do is waiting for his call.

For 18 years, she can't go on a date with him. She can't go to the night market with him. She can't go for a movie with him. She can't go on a vacation with him. She cannot have a meal in public with him, needless to say holding hand in hand.

I guess I will not be Carol. I want an ordinary relationship, so ordinary that no one bother even if we kiss in public. I want us to be able to share little things in our life. I want him to know what I am doing. I want us to do little things together. To be a little selfish, I want to be at the first priority in his list.

My dream relationship does not have to meet everyday. But I guess a phone call a day to tell how much we miss each other sounds very sweet. If possible, spend some time during weekends. We can go for a movie in the Saturday afternoon, then have a few friends together for dinner. I guess having friends together is sweet. When you mix with other people, you will find that you and him share a lot of things in common than other people. Plus, you will have more topics to talk about.

Sunday morning can be occupied with house chore or sports. It's family day and I guess we should spend this day with our family. It would be best to visit his house alternate Sunday to have dinner with his family. Then the other alternate Sunday for my family. Oh.. How I love family guys!

I guess I am dreaming way from reality. My family is so far away from me. The dream will only come true if I move back to Ipoh. Wait a minute, shall I do that?

Knowing clearly what I want but not being able to achieve it is frustrating. Love is about give and take. You will never know how love turns out until you're there. Who knows I am another Carol who is now secretly having an underground love with Lee Hom. *blinks blindly*

I haven't been hearing news from you. I wonder why it still aches so much just thinking of you. Are you holding another girl at this moment?
"Misses From Seoul - I miss you! And you know who you are. Can't seem to type anything in the body cos I'm logging in from my iPhone."
Is this for me? I guess I have lost faith.

And then, I still don't know how love happens.