Every time when I think of my age. I will get stuck at 24. I kindna have the impression that I am younger than my ex-classmates as my birthday is in December. Therefore, I will always have to minus one year from the actual age.
As I am turning 26 this year, I thought that I was still 24. I guess I really need a birthday cake with 25 candles on it so that I can really remember that. As I am typing now, I wondered again. Wait a minute, am I 24 or 25? Am I that old to have lost my memory?
Lately, I had fallen into depression. I felt like I have lost my confidence in most of the things. I felt like everybody of my age is doing better than I. I felt like I am fat, miserable and clumsy. I felt like I am still so childish and have not grown a bit. As age numbers increase, the expected maturity is not there at all.
I have not accomplished anything, I don't have a house, I don't have a target to work towards to. I don't have a person I want to marry. Hence, I won't have a child. But then, even if I work hard and own a house, I will be staying all by myself. I have been searching high and low for a room to stay lately, I can't even get to stay in a house with people I know. I feel so dump and lost in so many ways.
Seeing other friends moving on so swiftly is so hard. Some are planning wedding dinners, discussing wedding gowns. Others are talking about some housing loan and what "BLR" rate that I don't understand at all. Some are confidently doing masters. Some are already the assistant manager of the company. But where am I heading to?
I missed school. Feeling lost of closeness with my friends scares me. I guess that's why I always organize so many trips and gatherings. I am scared feeling alone. To have something to look forward to keeps me optimistic. That they are still close with me means so much to me.
I went to look up in Wikipedia about mid-twenties crisis. It seems like I have fit all the syndromes. I am officially diagnosed with quarter-life crisis. I wonder if I can cure myself. I wonder what I learned from my religion can be applied here. I wonder if reading books recommended by Wikipedia will make me better.
And I am still wondering....
14 comments:
wa, i googled the quarter-life crisis and you are indeed 95% match. dun b sad la, it's ok to be not that successful. Have ur own life and dun compare yourself with other ppl lup. They get married their business, doesn't mean you are the odd one out. I oso not quite close with my friends dy... maybe this is how it is when ppl have grown up lup.
=.=
hahahahahaha
From The Curious case of Benjamin Button :
For what it’s worth, it’s never too late, or in my case too early, to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit... start whenever you want... you can change or stay the same. There are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. I hope you see things that stop you. I hope you feel things that you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life that you’re proud of and if you find that you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again.
http://jason-beautiful-scenery.blogspot.com/2009/02/curious-case-of-benjamin-button-2008.html
Hope it gives you the strength to move forward.
I have quarter-life crisis too :(
You're not alone actually, many people face it but they may not admit it.
We can talk about this when I come back ok ? :)
http://www.nzgirl.co.nz/articles/5640
http://www.ehow.com/how_4769962_avoid-quarterlife-crisis.html
Maybe you should focus on how to overcome the so called crisis instead.
Have fun!
Cruella: You see, you will get that when you're older. Hahah!
Jason: Hahah.. You are still not done with Banjamin Button? I am so gonna watch that movie.
JP: Hahah... We'll talk about it when you're back ok?
SonBlogger: Thanks for the advice. I am working on it.
I am facing it too. (*.*)
Hahaha ... 20 , 30, 40 ~~
u get what i mean ~~ LOL
- Loo
Loo,
No I don't know what you mean. Hahaha...
hahaha ...
still wanna pretend r ?
u changed the crisis to become "cry-sis" LOL
anyway ... u know , i know lor ~~
if u don't mind, i can fwd it to u again geh ~~ :p
- Loo
But too bad ...
If i fwd it to u again, means ... that is another reminder .. to remind you that you are ... 2x already !! LOL
- Loo
What's wrong with crisis change to "cry-sis"? I just want to emphasize on the Mid-twenties crisis I have.
And I have told you that I am having this crisis even in the office, that's why you forward me the link. I admit mar.. Anything wrong?
Aiya, I know I am very pityful la.. No need step another foot on me la.
okok , sorry !
don't say you pitty la, as long as you don't be that choosy ... u should be able to gone through this cry-sis one !!
once u understand the meaning of 20, 30, 40 ... i think you should know how to choose from now on !! ... LOL
-Loo-
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